I had so many deep thoughts in my mind…
Now I lay here staring at a blank screen with no idea what to write, or where to start.
Sometimes I wish those around me could hop into my head. For just a moment.
I would be understood, and I would have less to worry about.
My thoughts suffocate me sometimes. I feel the need to get them out at that very moment.
That’s why I make rash decisions, and act on impulses.
I want those thoughts to be enacted, or shared.
That is why writing is so useful to me.
What I wish even more is that I could share these thoughts without seeming crazy.
Everyone has so many differing opinions or already perceived notions, it’s hard to just let the words come out.
I could say so much.
Especially to him. Him.
My mind automatically darted to a couple of “hims.”
There will always be something left unsaid.
I just wish it weren’t so. It eats me up inside. Not knowing why I have the emotions I do.
I know myself, and I love myself. That is enough. That is all I need to pursue the things I want in life. The obstacles, and my overwhelming thoughts are just a part of it. That’s me.
One day I will be able to share those very private thoughts with someone who cares about me, and wants to listen to every word.
That’s basically what all this is about.
Finding the person that matters.
I want that. I deserve that.
